i barfed on the bus

Back to school time reminds me of when I barfed on the bus. Well, not only when I barfed on the bus, but today that memory came flooding back just like it does when I see the poor girl I puked on.

It was elementary school and mom had made one of my favorite breakfasts that day – homemade biscuits drenched in fresh strawberries and juice. Who knows how many I ate because I had the same over indulgence problem then that I do now.

I honestly don’t remember when I started feeling bad, but I clearly remember pulling up in front of the elementary school that I used to go to where we changed buses. It had closed and several buses met there and exchanged students. Anyway, I’m standing there and here rolls up the other bus I’m supposed to get on. Everyone piles into the aisle of the packed bus and I start thinking, “I’m gonna puke.”

When I was that young, I was a very shy introvert, unlike my present self. I knew I was going to hurl, but I just couldn’t work up the courage to tell folks to get the hell out of my way! So, I just stood there feeling worse and worse, all the while praying that the bus door would open like the pearly gates and release all of the kids in front of me.

But, it didn’t and the bile ran up my throat along with the strawberries and biscuits (gross, huh?).

The little girl standing in front of me was about a foot shorter than I was and she was wearing a neon pink hat. The ironic part of this story is that she ended up marrying a preacher’s son, so I guess the good Lord was looking out for her that day. If she wouldn’t have been wearing the hat, she would have been showered with strawberry biscuit vomit.

Thank goodness she was wearing a hat similar to this one

After the downpour of puke, she gracefully placed her dripping cap on the bus seat and walked out the door. I honestly can’t remember if I cried or what, but the bus driver ended up taking me back home. She was even nice enough to buy me a coke at the store on the way home to help settle my stomach.

That day, I was supposed to do the May Pole dance at school, so mom ended up taking me on later. I didn’t get to do the dance, but that was probably best. It was embarrassing enough spewing on the bus, much less while going around in circles weaving ribbons.

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